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Is there a God? I say yes, because I trust first of all in my own experience, and because I simply cannot understand a purposeless, accidental, meaningless world. Does God care about us? I believe It does, though for over fifty years, I thought not. But I have opened my eyes, and have experienced the responsiveness to me, every day. I see evidence of God’s generosity and love all around me.
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So what is God? Well, that’s a question that will continue to challenge us for a long time, I think, though I believe that we as a species are coming closer to the truth. Many argue that God is simply a construction, a product of the human mind with which we either give the world and ourselves meaning, or try to explain the mysteries, the paradoxes, and the troubles of life. History and current events have shown us that the Gods we construct and define in our various belief systems are often self-serving, and can easily be manipulated in favour of the goals and prejudices of any person, group, or nation.
If I thought of God as a finite entity, with a beginning and an end, judgemental and favouring one species or group or time over another, then I would probably conclude that God did not exist before humans, and will not continue after we cease to be. After all, what would be the purpose of a finite, judgemental God if no one were around to pay attention, or to be judged? But if I think of God - as I do - as the very stuff and origin of being, of existence, of all that is, as life itself in all its physical and non-material aspects, then questions about whose God is the true God, and whether God exists are meaningless.
So what is God? Many people – wise and unwise - have tried to explain God, but never too well, in my opinion. Others, recognising the unfathomability and mystery of such an entity or force, say it is better not to even try. Yet so many of us persist. We try to understand in some way this thing that seems so out of reach, yet sometimes feels so intimate, and we search, each in our own way, for ways to touch and feel part of it. I find the best answer in those wise persons who tell us that God cannot be understood, and is ultimately unknowable, but that God can be experienced. Not fully, but undeniably and powerfully.
Since we can only experience things on a personal level – within ourselves, we each, to some degree, personify our notion of God. Yes, I personify God, not as a person with a beard, or a being in the sky, or as a watchful eye, but as an entity. I refer to God as It, because the only other alternatives in our language are ‘he’ or ‘she’, either of which I find unacceptable (for many reasons that are not relevant here). I have personified God because I have neither the words nor the mind to comprehend Its true nature, and can only speak of it in terms of what I already know.
I have enough insight to know that what God is far beyond my comprehension, far beyond my experience. Yet I feel intimately connected. This experience is no illusion,any more than any of my experiences can be considered illusory, and yet, it IS illusory, a thought creation, just as all my experiences are. Such is the paradox of being.
Does God need us? I was thinking about that recently, and concluded that God probably doesn’t need us in fundamental way - ie. to survive or to exist – though theories and beliefs about God certainly do need us to create and perpetuate them. But the God force Itself, does It need us? In some way, I believe It does. I believe that God needs us to experience Itself more fully.
What else can God experience if It created all that is? How else can God know Itself and express Itself if there is nothing other than what originated in God? Through the creative experience of all life forms. Through the infinite manifestations of probability generated by life forms.
Now, this idea is based on certain premises that I also think are true:
- that God has no material form or structure in Itself (in otherwords, that God is pure thought and intention)
- that God does not determine who we will become and what choices we will make, though It may be aware of our probable selves and probable choices (ie, we truly do have free will)
- that God is omnipresent and omniscient, both within and without us, experiencing every experience of every thing, animate and inanimate
- that God does not judge, approve, disapprove, but embraces all that is with at least what Rogers called unconditional positive regard, and most likely, love.
I believe that God experiences Its own creation in infinite variations and ways through us, that God experiences Its own creativity through us as we recreate ourselves and our lives.
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None of this may surprise God - but I think God delights in it, as we delight in the actions and experiences of our children and grandchildren. I think that God experiences Itself anew, similar to the way that we can experience life anew through our children and grandchildren. If I find fulfilment and joy in seeing and experiencing what I create - a garden, a life, a family, an experience. Perhaps God does also, though on a scale and in ways that are far beyond my paltry imagining.
I think that God needs us (or at least is really happy to have us around) because we reflect back to It Its creativity and love, and our experiences enrich Its knowing of Its own creative power. I believe that when we live creatively and with greater awareness, when we truly become observers of ourselves, we become more like God. We create new, unique threads of experience, increasing the field of possibilities for all beings. Sometimes, when one or more of us abandons fear and dares to risk everything to gain new experience, or to experience life, love, self, or whatever more fully, I almost hear God laughing with delight!
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But how did we humans seem to become such an important part of the Great Potential, as many sages have proposed? We are, after all, only a very small part of manifested creation. Perhaps we are not more important to God’s experience than, say, animals. Perhaps God expands through the experiences of life in all its forms - all that has been created, living things - and perhaps even inanimate things, if we can speak of such. I do not perceive God as something confined to some part of all that is, but as the source of all that is. I see God responding to Its own creations. We humans are, indeed, a rather late, perhaps fleeting, and small part of that.
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Can we really experience God? Yes, we can. But myths and the bible tell us that we are not able to know or withstand God as an entity…. just in small doses. By that I mean that we can experience God in everything and every moment, but perhaps not in Itself, perhaps not consciously. Yet through our myriad experiences, we can approach an understanding of God’s true nature. What I am trying to say - perhaps not well - is that I am, we are, all of life are sparks of God, but God cannot be contained in one or even a million sparks. So, individually, I and the rock and the fish are holograms, perhaps, of some aspects of God.
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And if I am made of God stuff, and God is within and without me, then to some degree, however small, God cannot be alien to me. I have it within me to recognise and experience God, though I may never, in all my aspects and parallel manifestations or lives, know It all.
A final thought. I remember reading about chimpanzees going through what seemed to be ritual behaviour during a storm or beneath a particularly bright and large full moon - and several primatologists reported that the behaviour appeared to include deferential gestures towards the sky. Hmmmm. Perhaps we have an innate need for something greater than ourselves. Perhaps we have an innate intuitive recognition of something greater than our individual selves, something meaningful and, dare I say it, divine. Perhaps all of our rituals, misguided religious beliefs, and constructed gods are just naïve attempts to be one with All That Is, and innate recognition that we are more than what we appear to be.
T.Z..
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